Still "hurting" from Katie the post op Transsexual's double savaging of two previously quite listenable (sp?) songs, I tuned into the results show. I was worried for the Wagster tonight, having a sneaking suspicion that Cowell and the producers wouldn’t allow him to progress any further in the competition. As a result I made the unprecedented move of actually voting for him (X Factor phone voting cherry now officially popped). Basically, I just added, whatever portion of my 35p he gets, to Cowell’s vast fortune – Oh well, it was worth a try.
Odd assortment of guests tonight. The lip-synching commenced with some group called ‘The Wanted’ that I had never heard of before they popped up on the Xtra Factor on Saturday night. Strangely unattractive bunch, apart from the one that looks like he has recently been released from Pentonville. (No idea what his name is, but he was definitely sufficiently thuggish for my tastes. I digress…) Justin Bieber, a pre teen phenomenon in the US was next. I know I should have hated him, but in the interest of full disclosure, I have to say that I quite liked the "Baby Oooh' song. (AND he 'mashed up' his own songs a la the Wagster - come on, he deserves a few brownie points???) Please don’t hate me.
The final guest was Nicole Sherzinger (no idea how to spell her name), who came, inexplicably, in a bondage outfit. Possibly to outdo Cheryl’s 19th century hooker outfit of a few weeks ago? No idea why, but the key point was that she obviously didn’t get the memo as she appeared to actually be singing. She went on to provide direct evidence to those weird conspiracy theorists, by speaking in Michael Jackson’s voice, (???) that maybe, just maybe he didn’t die after all…. No bottom clenchingly awful group song this week – I guess after yesterday’s performances the producers kindly decided to spare us.
The usual suspects went through, Becks, Matt the Hat, One Direction. To prove that show is still a fix, Daddy Snow went through, (even the studio audience were booing, proving my point.) As an aside, in the VT at the top of the show, Cole said of Daddy Snow that: “Whether people like it or not, she's amazing.” Cole missed the point by an enormous margin (again). I’ll say this very slowly Cole, if people don't like it, they won't vote for her or buy her records. Deep sigh...
So the bottom 3 were the Wagster, Mary and Katie the post op transsexual. You knew the Wagster's goose was cooked at that point, it was just a question of whether Cowell and the producers would fix it for Katie to stay. I think even they realised that keeping her in for another week would be a mistake and she FINALLY went. Rousing chorus of “At Last’ in her honour anyone?
So to the sing off with Dermot indicating to Louis that “Vargner's up first” and Louis stating: “OK it's Wagner”. He couldn’t even be bothered to get his name right for his last ever performance – shame on you Louis. Wagner sung “Unforgettable” and it may have been because I hadn’t had any alcohol, but he actually sounded quite good! Mary didn’t actually need to sing as the judges all know what Shirley Bassey sounds like (and everyone knew she wasn’t going anywhere tonight). Despite that, she screeched her way through what sounded like the same song as yesterday and the time before (repeat ad infinitum).
As expected the Wagster was sacrificed (side note: the producers fixed it so there was no chance of deadlock, by making Louis vote first…) We mustn't be greedy people, we couldn't expect to have everything our way in one evening. I for one, am happy to rejoice in the fact that the Katie the post op transsexual is finally gone. Cowell had the audacity to say that this result proves that "we've put this show back in the hands of the public". Errr, who does he think the people voting for the Wagster were if not the public???
Anyway, we must now turn our attention to getting rid of Daddy Snow - who has been under the radar in past weeks due to the presence of Katie the post op transsexual. There's nowhere to hide now Snow...
p.s. Wagster is unforgettable, someone give him a job 'in the show beezneez'