How did it come to this?

I was forced, on pain of death, to watch Sunday's Episode  of "The Only Way is Essex", by a friend who started watching because of this blog.  Bearing in mind the friend in question actually hails from Essex, you'd think she'd be encouraging me NOT to watch. This show is doing nothing, absolutely nothing, good for the reputation of the county.....

Arg & Lyd
So Deuces (Mark's Bar) had it's grand opening and almost instantaneous closing this week.  There was a Halloween themed party to celebrate, which gave the producers the opportunity to start the episode with Arg trying on a Wedding dress (a potential Halloween costume). Arg may be simple, but he's not that simple, he refused to wear it. He made up with Lyd who, in order to ensure the storyline the producers were after materialised, was the only person Mark could get to work the bar that evening.  It worked, Arg and Lyd,  had a heart to heart and made up. (Lyd, was no where near as Orange as last week - thankfully, as my jet lagged eyes were far too tired for a repeat of last weeks riot of colour). In other good news... Kirk and Amy made up, I think. Amy had a modelling test shoot with her top off, to capture male viewers. Mark's sister's group are going to be made famous in the next two weeks by new management that they ditched Mark for. Mark's opening night went well, Kirk's assessment being: "the effort he put in was good, but I think it's a bit of a shit'ole". Mmmm, perhaps the purported research trip to Essex should bypass Deuces...  

In an effort to present a balanced view of Essex life.... there was quite a bit of bad news too. Mark realised he still loves Large Lauren. Nanny Pat wisely informed him that he can't have two girlfriends. He wisely went with the one that isn't Large Lauren. Sam tried to sabotage Mark's relationship with the one that isn't Large Lauren, Arg "The Date Doctor" Argent salvaged it (we like Arg). Sadly, in a freak accident (staged by the producers possibly? Or someone else who thinks the bar is "a bit of a shit'ole"?) half of Deuces burned down.  That was it really, nothing else exciting happened. The trailer for Wednesday's episode didn't tantalise. Please don't make me watch it again :-)

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